pirate code

(we figured they were more actual … guidelines)


i accept paypal, visa, mastercard, american express, & discover • if you need to pay another way • talk to me & we’ll work something out

ship ahoy

i usually ship on wednesdays • unless i’m on the road or at a long show • (or it’s a diy order because those take longer) • i use usps first class or priority • if you want your stuff shipped another way just ask and i’ll let you know if it’ll cost more

please make really sure you got your address right • & that you pick up your package if you need • if i have to ship again because of either of those i’ll pass the cost on to you

don’t like your plunder?

not happy with your purchase • let me know & i’ll fix it • if all else fails you can send it back (unless you’ve used some) within fifteen days of when you got it • once i get it back i’ll ship your exchange (or refund your money) • & let you know it’s on its way

loot broken, wrong, or lost?

if it’s wrong, let me know & i’ll send the right thing • if it’s broken, save everything (including the box) & let me know (pictures are useful too) & i’ll replace it • if you think it’s lost talk to me & i’ll go poke the post office about it


i’d seriously rather have more trees than a printed catalog


i don’t share your personal information with anyone ever • (i really hate it when that happens) • when you pay with a card on my website or at a show • it’s encrypted & transmitted using state of the art SSL (Secure Socket Layers) tech • & i’m the only person who ever has access • my credit card processor is also PCI compliant • which protects your card information during & after your purchase

email newsletter

only if you actually sign up for it • which you can do at checkout • or there’s a signup thing at the bottom of every page • i don’t assume you want to get my newsletter just because you bought something from me • those aren’t the same thing & that’s not how consent works


i’ll only send you emails that are relevant to your order • (unless you signed up for the newsletter) • you can sign up to get a reminder about reviewing my stuff at checkout if you like • but i don’t send those out automatically, either • consent & all that


allergic reactions to my stuff are rare • but it’s your job to remember your allergies & sensitivities • the information presented on this website is not meant to diagnose or treat any medical condition • nor to replace the advice or care of a qualified health professional

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